


Clean

by ddelusionall



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band)
Genre: Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Prostitution, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-16
Updated: 2009-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:27:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23929159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddelusionall/pseuds/ddelusionall
Summary: Changmin wants Junsu to stop.
Relationships: Kim Junsu (JYJ)/Shim Changmin
Kudos: 2





	Clean

**Author's Note:**

> I am importing my stories from LiveJournal. The original fic can be found [here](https://be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com/).
> 
> I haven't read this story in a long time, so I may have missed some tags. Just let me know if I did.

Junsu stood under the shower spray. He turned the temperature hotter, trying to at least feel slightly clean. His skin turned red.

The first thing he’d done was clean the remnants of his afternoon activities out of his ass, but the sticky, uncomfortable feeling lingered. It would always linger.

He lathered up a loufa again.

Someone knocked and then the door opened, releasing some of the steam.

“Holy shit, Su,” Changmin said. “Do you have the temperature up high enough?”

“No,” he snapped.

Changmin was silent for a moment. He had that annoying habit, and Junsu even knew that he was biting his lower lip. And he would ask if Junsu was okay in three, two, o—

“Are you okay, Su?”

Junsu smiled bitterly. “Yes.”

“Liar. You’ve been upset for a few weeks. Did I do something to piss you off?”

Junsu sighed. Changmin was the last person on this earth who would piss him off. “No, Min.”

“I know you know I’ve noticed, and I won’t pry, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“Yeah, thanks, Minnie.”

“I’m going to do some laundry. Do you want me to wash these clothes for you?”

“Sure. Is Yunho home?”

“No, he’s out with those buddies of his.”

Clothes shuffled, and Junsu winced when he heard money hit the floor. And then heard the bills shuffled. Changmin counting. And Changmin would ask why right about no—

“Why do you have four hundred American dollars?”

Junsu stayed silent. Four hundred dollars for less than a half hour of work. Another wave of dirtiness hit him.

“Just tell me if you stole it, because if you—”

“I didn’t steal it,” Junsu said.

Silence again.

“Would you put two hundred of that into the rent and bills bucket?” Junsu asked in a controlled tone.

Silence, and then, “Alright.”

The door shut and Junsu let out a sigh of relief, a sigh that was cut off when his phone rang and Changmin answered it.

“Junsu’s phone, this is Changmin speaking … um, he’s in the shower at the moment … sure, I’ll let him know. Bye. Junsu! You need to call someone named YoungSaeng when you get out!”

Junsu finished the sigh. He didn’t need Changmin to tell him who had called.

He finished the shower, dried off and went to his room to dress. YoungSaeng liked him snazzy, liked him dressed up and perfect, before destroying him and practically everything he was wearing.

He pulled on gray, pin-striped slacks and a deep green button down shirt. No underwear, nothing underneath. YoungSaeng liked it that way. He threw on a sport coat and a few accessories. He grabbed his phone, enough cash for a taxi and then headed out.

Changmin whistled at him. “Wow. Looking good. You didn’t say you had a date tonight.”

Junsu shrugged. “I don’t. It’s a business thing.”

“Oh. Well, have fun.”

“Yeah, fun.”

Junsu left before he saw the look of concern he knew was on Changmin’s face.

***

Later that night, well, early the next morning as he stumbled against the door of their apartment, fumbled with the keys, he wondered again why he bothered at all to try to hide from Changmin. Junsu’s green shirt was open, the buttons lying scattered somewhere on the floor of a hotel room. Were his pants in tact? He checked. Yep, but they smelled like soju and semen. He didn’t even know where his sport jacket had ended up. He had his phone, that was all that mattered. Oh, and almost eight hundred dollars in his pocket.

Changmin opened the door for him, and then stepped back.

“If you ask me if I’m okay, I’m going to punch you,” Junsu said and staggered past him. It wasn’t that he was drunk, well he was, but—

“Dude, Su,” Yunho said with a laugh. “Looks like you had a good night. Smells like it, too. Someone had a shitload of sex tonight.”

“Fuck you,” Junsu snapped at the dark blur and blond blur curled up on the couch. He staggered through the living room. He ran into a table and felt Changmin reach for him.

“Don’t touch me,” he practically screamed.

“Su.”

Junsu winced at the hurt and concern in that single syllable of his name. “I’m okay. Just leave me alone.”

He took another shower to help sober him up, because it didn’t matter how many times he scrubbed himself, he’d still be dirty. He wasn’t surprised to see Changmin sitting on his bed when he came out. The new wad of money was in his hands. Junsu ignored him. Felt his stare and his question and his concern and ignored him.

He put on sleep pants, set his alarm for seven and slipped into bed. It wasn’t long until Changmin sighed and rose. He turned the light off. When the bed dipped again and the corner of the blanket lifted, Junsu gasped and held his breath.

“Good night, Su,” Changmin whispered.

Changmin never slept with him. Ever. Sometimes, after a girl had broken Yunho’s heart, he didn’t mind curling up with Junsu. But Changmin hated sharing his space. Hated being too close.

When Junsu had the guts to peer over his shoulder, he was greeted by Changmin’s back, clad in a tank top. Junsu moved closer to the wall, but his foot found Changmin’s, and their ankles wrapped together.

Junsu slept well, better than he had for months.

***

Neither of them mentioned that night.

***

Three weeks later, with his hands tied to a head board and the smallest dick to ever fuck him fucking him, he wondered how he managed to end up like this.

Of course it started with money. A simple grumbling in front of his boss on payday about needing more of it.

“I can get you more, but you have to trust me,” his boss had said.

Trust him? Sure, why not? He’d worked for the man for years.

He had his first job the next day. He hadn’t felt clean since.

“Stupid whore.”

A hand landed across his head.

“You’re not fucking paying attention to me.”

“You’re not doing anything to pay attention to,” Junsu shot back and received another sharp slap on the back of his head.

“Fuck you, you little bitch. I’m fucking paying you for this, so damn it, if I tell you that I want to hear you say my name, then you sure as hell better say it.”

“I can’t remember your name.”

“Then don’t say my name. Your mind is evidently elsewhere. Say the name of who you wish was pounding into you.”

Junsu froze and the man laughed. “So there is someone? What? Is he straight? Married? Has a girlfriend?”

Junsu didn’t answer.

A firm hand wrapped around his neck and yanked his head back. Teeth bit into his ear.

“Say his name,” the man whispered.

Junsu swallowed.

The hand tightened. “Say it,” he repeated.

Junsu didn’t want to, ever, he’d never ever ever, even if he used to jerk off to the thought even if he wanted it more than anything, he wouldn’t cheapen it by giving this man the satisfaction. The other man’s hand wrapped around his cock and stroked him harshly.

“You’re thinking of him, aren’t you? Wishing I was him. Well, you little whore, I know you boys never come during sex, but I will make you come. Because you’ll think about him, smiling at you, kissing you, treating you like someone, not just some cute ass to fuck, because that’s what you want, isn’t it? You want him to bend you over and prepare you and make love to you with shared breaths and kisses and—”

Junsu tried to block out his voice, tried to block out the continuous stream of things that he wouldn’t even let himself hope for. He wasn’t sure when he started crying, but he did. The man’s hand never stopped moving.

And Junsu came, Changmin’s name falling from his lips in desperation.

The man laughed, flung Junsu hard enough that he hit his head on the head board and then continued to fuck him, fuck and laugh and ridicule him as he lay there and cried.

When he was finished, he untied Junsu’s hands. He put money on the table. “Here’s a bit extra for your boytoy. Go buy him something nice.”

He spit on Junsu and left the room.

Junsu didn’t get up for a very long time.

***

He arrived home to dinner being made. Changmin rarely cooked, and he was never home. Yunho ate ramen for every meal.

“Hey, Su,” Changmin said from the kitchen. “Did you have a good day?”

Junsu swallowed his distaste. “Yeah, sure,” he muttered and headed down the hall.

“Su?” Changmin said behind him.

Junsu expected him to follow, and he wasn’t disappointed, but what he wasn’t expecting was an arm shoving him against the wall. Changmin pinned him, dug his hand into Junsu’s pocket and pulled out his daily take.

“Why?” Changmin asked, dropping the money on the floor. “You fucking won’t talk to me about it and I’m tired of pretending I don’t know. So if you don’t fucking tell me why right this second—”

“We need money.”

“Not this badly! Damn it, Su, I can’t sit here and watch you do this anymore. You’re destroying yourself.”

Junsu pushed him away. “Well, it’s myself to destroy, isn’t it? I don’t belong to you.”

He continued down the hall, throat tight, tears pricking his eyes. He should have known that Changmin knew.

“So you belong to them,” his voice echoed in Junsu’s brain as he slammed the bathroom door and locked it. Changmin tried to come in, and then he knocked and shouted at him through the door.

Junsu ignored him and took a shower, tears washing away with the heat. He ignored Changmin when he got out, ignored him, but didn’t quite get his bedroom door shut fast enough. Changmin followed him in, sat on his bed and watched him dress.

“It didn’t take me that long to figure it out,” Changmin said, “but it took a lot longer for me to admit it to myself. No, Junsu would never do that. Not my Junsu. You hear that, Su? My Junsu. Mine.”

“Shut up, Changmin,” Junsu said. “You have no idea what that means.”

“Don’t I? Who has had to sit here day after day and week after week and watch you disintegrate? Watch those smiles disappear. Watch your eyes cloud over. You’re my best friend, Su. You think this hasn’t hurt me?”

“You poor thing. Remind me to remember that tomorrow when some guy decides he wants to beat my face in just to get one off.”

Changmin winced. “Fuck you, Su. I’ll barricade you in this apartment if I have to. We don’t need money this badly. We were making it just fine before.”

“And now we’re not struggling.”

“You’re not struggling? Su, you’re miserable, don’t you lie to me.”

“I’m fine.”

“Don’t lie to me. Please.”

Junsu stared out the bedroom window. “Your food is burning.”

“Shit,” Changmin said and left the room quickly.

Junsu sat on his bed, in the warm spot left by Changmin’s body. Mine. Mine. Mine. He slid his hand into his pants and started stroking himself to the echoes of Changmin’s voice.

Footsteps in the hall. Junsu’s lip curled in a snarl.

Mine? Let’s see how much he wants me to be his.

He stripped off the pants and propped himself up on his pillows.

Changmin stopped in the doorway, wide eyes following the movements of Junsu’s hand. He swallowed. After a few tense moments, he flicked his eyes up and met Junsu’s glare.

“Come and make me yours,” Junsu whispered.

Changmin didn’t move. A twinge of hurt grew as each second passed and Changmin didn’t come to the bed. Junsu covered the pain in insistent strokes on his cock. Small whimpers that he didn’t need to fake. Having Changmin watch him was more stimulating than having a random cock up his ass. His breathing grew erratic, his stroking faster. He threw his head back and arched his body as a wave of pleasure coursed through him. Changmin’s name, loud, needy, desperate.

A hand grabbed his wrist, and he whimpered when his orgasm faded.

But then lips were on his, kissing him, tongue sliding into his mouth. Body on top, hands sliding along skin.

Junsu opened his eyes, just to make sure, just to make sure he wasn’t dreaming, wasn’t hoping that some guy was Changmin.

Changmin’s eyes were closed tightly, like he didn’t want to look.

And then Junsu felt the stiffness, the jerky motions.

He pushed Changmin away, practically throwing him off, and then sat up on the bed, taking deep, controlled breaths. He jerked away from Changmin’s questing hand and snapped, “I don’t need a pity fuck.”

“Then how about a slightly nervous one from someone who’s desperately in love with you?”

Junsu’s breath caught.

“Please, Su.”

Fingers touched his back.

“I think about it. About you with someone else. All the time, and it hurts because I don’t know what to do to make you stop hurting.”

Fingers gripped at his hip.

“I can’t watch you fall apart anymore. I can’t.” Changmin’s voice cracked. “I can’t watch you come home after being with someone else and sequester yourself in your room. Shut me out of your life.”

Changmin shifted, legs on either side of Junsu, and then wrapped him up. Arms around his upper body, legs around his lower. He pressed his face into Junsu’s neck.

“Tell me what to do to make the pain go away.”

Junsu turned in his arms and met Min’s eyes.

“Please,” Changmin said, “please don’t do it anymore.”

Junsu swallowed and shook his head. “I won’t. I promise.”

Changmin lowered them back to the bed. Junsu cried. Changmin ran soft hands on his back and through his hair, kissing his head and cheek and whispering reassurances at him.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Junsu said.

“I know. I should have said something sooner, but I guess I just hoped that I was wrong.”

“I’m sorry. You must hate me.”

“No way. No. Way.” Changmin tightened his hold. "Do you want me to make you some tea?”

“No. Then you’d have to get up.”

Junsu resettled, resting his head on Changmin’s chest. Changmin traced circles on his side and back. He slept, waking only when Changmin shifted them and spooned up behind him. With soft breath on his neck, and a loose arm around his waist, he slept again.

He woke up before Changmin and stared at him. Looked and memorized his face and how his eyes fluttered. He caressed his chest and stomach, grinning when Changmin jerked but didn’t wake up. Junsu leaned down and licked one of his nipples. Changmin tossed between dreams and awake. He moaned and his arm tightened around Junsu as he lowered his mouth to Changmin’s stomach and wrapped his hand around Changmin’s erect cock.

“Mmm, Su,” Changmin moaned.

Junsu licked the tip of him and then pushed Changmin into his mouth. After only a few sucks, hands gripped his hair and Changmin started thrusting down Junsu’s throat.

“Oh, god,” Changmin muttered, voice heavy with sleep.

Junsu planned on just teasing him, but with the way Changmin’s body was jerking, there wasn’t going to be time for much else.

At least this round.

With a loud cry and hard thrust, Changmin came and Junsu swallowed. He didn’t want to analyze the meaning of it now, but Changmin’s come tasted better than anyone else’s and Junsu wanted to swallow it forever. He moved his kisses up Changmin’s heaving body. He straddled Changmin’s hips, quivering cock between his ass cheeks.

“Morning,” he whispered and then kissed Changmin’s reply away.

Changmin sat up suddenly. He cupped Junsu’s ass and pressed a still hard cock against him. “Tell me what to do so I can fuck you,” he whispered and bit Junsu’s lower lip.

Junsu moaned. “Lube, top drawer,” he managed.

Changmin leaned away for a moment. He fumbled with the drawer because of the angle but finally managed to grab the slim bottle.

“Fingers,” Junsu said, unable to say anything else. Anticipation blocked his breathing. Changmin coated his fingers, and then holding him tightly with one arm, his slid those fingers around Junsu’s ass and between his cheeks. His fingers slid along his crack, searching and then pausing at Junsu’s hole.

Junsu threw his head back and pushed down, impaling himself.

Changmin tsked and pulled away. “Let me do it,” he said.

Junsu moaned when the finger pushed in slowly. He didn’t want slow, he wanted it fast and then he wanted to feel Changmin inside him. Pounding him, owning him.

“More, please, Min, please, I need you,” Junsu whimpered.

Another finger slid in with the first.

“Is two enough?” Changmin asked, worried.

“God, yes, too much, please just—”

The rest of his words were muffled as Changmin kissed him. He pushed his fingers deeper and faster, twisting them, until the only word from Junsu’s mouth was please.

Junsu whimpered in disappointment when he withdrew his fingers.

“Now what?” Changmin asked, amusement coloring his voice.

Junsu tried to smile. “Fuck me.”

Changmin flipped them over, covered Junsu’s body and slid his slickened dick against Junsu’s. Junsu groaned and lifted his hips.

“Please, Minnie, please.”

Changmin held Junsu’s hips up, and Junsu threw his legs over Min’s arms.

“It’s easier,” he gasped and then tightened his legs and pulled Changmin closer. Changmin’s eyes shut when his dick slid along Junsu’s crack. Junsu threw his head back with a cry. Changmin grabbed his cock and directed it and pressed into Junsu’s ass.

“Oh, fuck,” Changmin said as he slid all the way in.

Junsu cried out.

“Are you alright?” Changmin asked.

Around gasping breaths, Junsu smiled. “Never. Better. Move.”

Changmin chuckled and did as he was told.

Junsu shut his eyes, hands clutching at Changmin’s arms. He didn’t need to pretend. He didn’t need to hope or dream or pray that the man above him was Changmin.

The darkness behind his eyelids blurred. He forced his eyes open, needing to reassure himself that it was Changmin.

“Touch me,” Junsu begged. “Please.”

Changmin gripped Junsu’s cock and stroked in a static rhythm. It was enough, and Junsu came into his hand, screaming his name as he had the strongest orgasm in a long time.

“Beautiful,” Changmin said, and then kissed Junsu hard.

Junsu couldn’t catch his breath, head light from his orgasm, body still quivering from Changmin’s continued attention.

Changmin came, moaning into Junsu’s mouth, body shaking and then collapsing, holding Junsu tightly, breath harsh in his ear. Their sweaty skin slid along each other. Junsu whimpered when Changmin left his body.

“Come shower with me,” Changmin said.

Junsu smiled. “Why?”

“So I can fuck you under the water, why else?”

Junsu laughed.

Changmin propped up and looked at him with a small smile. “That’s the first time you’ve laughed in weeks.”

“I know.”

“Where the fuck are you guys?” Yunho’s voice yelled.

Junsu looked at Changmin. “Do we tell him?”

“He already knows I’m hopelessly in love with you.”

“Does he know I've been … ” Junsu couldn’t finish.

“No. He just thinks you’re being a little pouty bitch about something.”

Changmin grabbed the blanket and flung it over their bodies as the door opened.

“There you are,” Yunho said. “Shit, it’s like you two …” He trailed off and then blushed. “Oh, never mind. Anyway.” He cleared his throat. “Jaejoong’s coming over to cook breakfast.”

“How’d you con him into that?” Changmin asked.

“Yeah, um. We’ll not talk about that, yes?”

“That means you gave him head.”

Yunho blushed and hastily left the room.

Junsu collapsed into a fit of giggles. Changmin gathered him close. “Come on. Let’s go shower before Jae gets here.”

Changmin climbed out of bed first and then helped Junsu up. He kissed him hard. “No more,” he whispered again.

“I already promised,” Junsu replied and then winced. “I’m going to have to get a new job.”

“Why?”

“My boss is who pimped me out.”

“Oh. Yeah. New job for you.”

Junsu smiled. Changmin slung an arm around his shoulders and steered him to the shower. After Changmin filled him one more time, and he splattered come between them, Changmin cleaned him off, wiped his body with soap and washed his hair. Junsu smiled through the whole thing. Smiled as Changmin dried him off and then carried him back to the bedroom, thoughts of more on both their minds. As Changmin pushed into him again, it was the first time in a long time that Junsu finally felt clean.


End file.
